July 7, 2013
Matt Rawlings
This past week, Egypt experienced a military take-over and
the country remains in a state of uncertainty and unrest. All over the world
many countries are experiencing unrest and fighting. In our own country, I am
grateful to God that we don’t have the same physical unrest. But we are a
country divided by so many issues and political perspectives. There is
political in-fighting and mud-slinging, no matter what side anyone is on and
people are hotly divided into their own interest groups. Vitriol and hatred
spill onto the airwaves, into TV broadcasts and in print. The new tolerance
isn’t tolerance at all but instead is an angry suppression of those who say
that there is absolute, Biblical-based truth. In the homes across our nation,
the quarrels are seen every day in broken families. Anger turns into violence
and murder on the streets as people fight for what they perceive to be their
rights. In the church, many denominations are marked not just by healthy
disagreement but by gossip, slander and hatred.
But, lest we think we are immune to the problem, in our own
homes, we all are challenged by temptations to anger, bitterness and
resentment, which left unchecked, leads to hatred and murderous thoughts. We
experience anger with classmates; anger with friends; anger with those who
disappoint us; anger with those who offend us; anger with our siblings; anger
with our children; anger with our spouses; anger with our fellow brothers and
sisters in Christ.
We who were once lost, separated from God and deserving of
His furious wrath have been loved by God, forgiven of all our crimes against
Him, given new hearts and new minds in Christ. So how can we still be so angry?
How can we who have been redeemed and reconciled with God fall prey to hatred
towards our fellow man, when we know only God’s love now? Why do we continue to
be tempted with anger in almost everyone of our relationships? How is it that
we give in to anger?
We have been going through a series in church over the past
9 weeks that we’ve called “Living at Peace Together, as Disciples in Community". In
our care groups, we’ve been going through a video series to coincide with this
that is about “Resolving Everyday Conflict”. So, why are we still struggling?
Why do we still have a hard time with simply not being angry with our family,
friends and co-workers? Is something unusual wrong with us?
These are all relevant questions aren’t they? I would
propose that something indeed is wrong with us but it is not something that is
impossible to change.
Something is indeed wrong with all of humanity in fact, but
humanity is not beyond the reach of God’s grace.
Something is so wrong with us, that it gets at the core of
our being. So, what is it? Let’s turn in our Bibles to James chapter 4 and read
from God’s Word together. I believe that as we look at God’s Word to us from
James 4, that God will help us see what is wrong and also help us see hope in
Him.
"What
causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions
are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and
cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not
ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your
passions. You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world
is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes
himself an enemy of God. Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the
Scripture says, 'He yearns jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell
in us"? But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, "God opposes the
proud, but gives grace to the humble.' Submit yourselves therefore to God.
Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw
near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you
double-minded. Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning
and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you." (James 4:1-10)
The Bible doesn't skirt around difficult issues in life
does it? It doesn't avoid what is wrong with us. In fact, the Bible is God’s
loving letter to us, explaining what is wrong with us and then God gives us
hope in Him. Scriptures like this one are hard but they are good. They are good
because God desires for us to be set free from enslavement to sin by His grace
and He uses Scriptures like this to do it.
We asked a lot of questions before we read this passage
from James 4. Scripture answers those questions and provides help. I find
personally, that this Scripture is like being cut open by a skillful surgeon. There
is cutting and pain and some bleeding, but it is to remove the tumor that has
grown in my heart and help me heal by God’s grace. This passage answers the
nagging question of what is wrong with us – why do we still get angry – why do
we still quarrel and fight directly. And it is not shallow or coy. James says
in verse 1...
"What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you?"
What is at the root of the quarrels and fights among you?
James is writing to believers. He is writing primarily to Jewish Christians but
the letter applies to all Christians and by the Holy Spirit, the letter applies
to us today. At the beginning of his letter, in James 1:12, the brother of
Jesus wrote, "Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for
when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has
promised to those who love him." (James
1:12) His desire – God’s desire is that we should remain
steadfast under trial, so that when we have stood, we will receive the crown of
life, which God has promised to those who love Him.
This puts it all in perspective, our main goal in life
must not be to accumulate things or to gain relationships on this earth to seek
fulfillment. As Christians, God has given us a new desire to stand the test and
receive the crown of life, knowing that God loves us and we love Him. But we
face temptations to turn aside from God and turn to other things. In verse 13
of chapter 1, James says, "Let no
one say when he is tempted, 'I am being tempted by God,' for God cannot be
tempted with evil, and he himself tempts no one. But each person is tempted
when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has
conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death." (James 1:13-15) You see, nothing has changed in the way that the human
heart works. Nothing has changed about the core desires that motivate us and
drive us. Technology has changed, the world has gotten better at killing, and
what we desire looks differently, but fundamentally, the core of who we are is
still motivated in the same way. We are ruled by desires, by passions. We are
enticed by our own desires and when our desires have conceived, they give birth
to sin. So, here in chapter 4, James brings things around again and explains
what causes quarrels and what causes fights among you. And in the second part
of verse 1, he answers his own question and says...
“Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you?”
God isn’t causing you to be angry. Your circumstances are
not causing you to be angry. Your fellow man is not causing you to be angry. Did
you get that? We need to hear the truth of this scripture don’t we? I wish I
could say that somehow as your pastor I am immune to fights and quarrels. I
wish I could say that I don’t get angry. But I do. I am tempted to get angry
when I don’t get what I want. I am tempted to anger when things don’t go my
way. I am tempted to be angry with my spouse and with my kids and even with my
parents and siblings – when I thought that would go by the wayside when I
turned 40. But I didn’t leave my heart behind when I got older. No matter what
age we are, we all face the same challenges of anger, quarrels and fights.
Now, James is intentionally vague – the quarrels and
fights may be literal fist-fights but they are also just plain old fighting for
what we perceive to be our rights – it includes, all manner of anger expressed
in arguments, snappy tones, irritation, biting sarcasm, harsh words, yelling
and all even the cold-war kind of fights that we can have and pretend that it
is somehow better because we don’t yell and say things out loud. But we are fuming
and angry and bitter and hateful inside. Our passions are still at war within
us. And this word for passion – it is also translated at times as pleasures,
desires for pleasure, evil desires or cravings.
Although we are a new creation, the problem is that sin
remains. The apostle Paul described the sin nature like this in Romans 7:21-23.
He said, "So I find it to be a law
that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. For I delight in the law
of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war
against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells
in my members." (Romans 7:21-23)
There is a war for our hearts going on inside of each and
every one of us who have been born again by God. It is a constant war – one
that has raged in everyone who has trusted in God since the fall of mankind. There
is a war inside of every Christian. There are evil desires that we want. We
want things that are not good for us. We want fame, we want notoriety, we want
recognition, we want to be praised for what we've done and who we are. We want
the glory that only God is due. These are the evil desires that all of us face
at times. But they are subtle.
We have grown to accept glory-seeking. We have become
comfortable with it. But it is like sleeping with the enemy – it is never good
– it is always dangerous. It is like laying down with a viper and hoping it
won’t bite us. But the desire for glory wages war within us. When
someone else gets the recognition we feel like we deserve, we can get angry. When
someone else is recognized and we are skipped over, we can get angry. When
someone else is commended and we are not, we can be jealous and envious. Why?
Because we have a desire for glory waging war within us. We want worship, when
we were meant to worship God alone. And it is war. We want to be in control and
we justify it by saying that we like order. Order is good but when we get angry
when we don’t get it, it reveals that it is not just a good desire we have – it
is a desire to control our own destiny. We want to control our own destiny and
we mask it in polite things.
All manner of passions, evil desires and cravings remain
in our hearts. That is why the apostle Peter said in 1 Peter 2:11, "Beloved, I urge you as sojourners and
exiles to abstain from the passions of the flesh, which wage war against your
soul." (1 Peter 2:11) The
passions of the flesh wage war against our souls. The passions of the flesh are
not ambivalent – they are not to be coddled and cuddled, protected and fed. They
are waging war against our very souls. And when we don’t get our evil desires,
when our passions, our cravings, our lusts of the flesh are not fulfilled, what
happens? James tells us in verse 2. He says...
"You desire and do not have, so you murder."
When we don’t get what we want we murder. Most of the
time the murder is in our hearts, but left unchecked, it results in actual
murder. When we desire and we don’t get what we desire, we get angry, we yell,
we are hateful. We murder. Jesus said in Matthew, "You have heard that it was said to those of old,
'You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.' But I
say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to
judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and
whoever says, 'You fool!' will be liable to the hell of fire." (Matthew 5:21-22) Being angry is like murdering in our hearts.
I must admit that I am too comfortable with anger
personally. Much to my shame, there are countless times in the past month alone
when I have been angry with my spouse, my kids and others and forget Jesus’
words saying that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to
judgment. It is not what we look like on the outside that is as important –we
need to be concerned about what is going on inside of us.
Later in Matthew 15, Jesus said, "But what comes out of the mouth proceeds
from the heart, and this defiles a person. For out of the heart come evil
thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander. These
are what defile a person." (Matthew
15:18-20) It is what proceeds from our hearts that defiles us. James
goes on in the next part of verse two to say the same thing another way and he
says...
“You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel”
Not only do we want things, we desire and crave things
and when we don’t get them, we get angry. But we covet things – we want the
things that other people have. We are full of jealousy. And when we see that
other people get the things or the people that we want, we fight and quarrel.
And it starts early on in life doesn’t it? If you have
kids, have you ever heard complaints something like this, “Mom, dad, Billy took
my toy and I want it back” -or- “It’s not fair, they already had a turn and it’s
my turn now.” -or- “they have 5 toys and
I only have 3”? Now, we just mask our coveting and refine it as we grow up. From
early on in the teen years and into adulthood, we can covet friendships and we
can covet fitting in or being popular. And when we feel like we don’t fit in or
we aren’t popular, we get angry and we fight and quarrel and we are jealous and
we can call names or put other people down.
- We can covet all kinds of things:
- · We can covet being cool.
- · We can covet being on the “in-crowd”.
- · We can covet looks and talents.
- · We can covet homes and cars.
- · We can covet clothes and fashion sense.
- · We can covet being a good parent or how someone else seems to have it all together.
- · We can covet being a good cook or we can covet someone who blogs and we wish we were like them.
- · We see the unrealistic world that others paint and that we can paint on facebook, twitter, pinterest or instagram and we can covet what is a white-washed superficial view of reality. But the truth is that anyone can appear to be anything today and we covet appearances.
- · We covet the perfect girlfriend or boyfriend.
- · We covet success in athletics.
- · We covet good grades.
- · We covet the perfect kids.
- · We covet dressing our kids in cute and cool clothes.
The world we live in today is so full of comparison and
coveting – it is no wonder there are quarrels and fights. We covet and cannot
obtain, so we fight and quarrel. Maybe the source of the fighting is the parent
or friend or spouse who we see as standing in our way and keeping us from
getting what we want. Paul Tripp says it this way, “We look at people as either
agents to deliver our desire or walls in the way of our desire. And when
we don’t get what we want, we get angry and want to remove them.”
We covet and we cannot get, so we fight – we get angry –
we quarrel. James is cutting us all to the heart here isn’t he? Well, it
doesn't stop there. He says, sometimes get don’t get things because God is not
part of the equation – God is not in your thoughts and prayers. He says...
“You do not have, because you do not ask.”
You don’t ask God, and so you are frustrated. But the
problem is not just that we don’t ask God – we don’t appeal to God, we also ask
wrongly. Look at verse 3, it says...
"You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on
your passions."
Often, we Christianize our evil desires and we try to
make our passions, our cravings palatable and we even pray that God would give
our cravings to us. And in relation to God, Paul Tripp goes on to say that, “We
don’t want God to be our Father, we want Him to be our vending machine.” We
want God to give us our desires, our passions, our cravings and we can seek to
use Him to get what we want. But, God will have none of this.
God doesn’t want us to be satisfied in so many lesser
things – He doesn’t want us to seek satisfaction in fellow creatures or in the
Creation, because these things ultimately will not satisfy us – they are not
the best for us, even though it may seem like it is. God is the best thing for
us and He longs for us to have what is best for us – Himself!
So, God at times frustrates our prayers and doesn’t give
us what we ask for, because it wouldn’t be good for us. But we stand there and
scream at God like a little child throwing a temper tantrum. Last week, I took
something away that could hurt my little toddler. And he screamed and he was
angry and he kicked and he was convinced I was being mean and he was sad and
there were tears and much yelling. But I took it from him because what he
wanted – what he was passionate about having wasn’t good for him.
At times, we can be convinced that what is good for
someone else would be good for us. But we don’t know everything perfectly like
God does. We don’t know what is best and safe for our souls. We don’t know what
will lead to our ultimate good and growth in godliness, but God does. We can be
like a toddler that screams because a sharp knife is taken away from us,
because our brother or sister is safe with it, but we would cut ourselves with
it. God is after our hearts though and He knows what is best and He will not
allow His children to follow after other gods of their own making – because it
is disastrous.
We are like the Israelites who made a golden calf to
worship because they were convinced that they needed a god that they could see.
But the calf was not God at all and could do them no good. And James sets us
straight, he says in verse 4...
"You adulterous people! Do you not know that
friendship with the world is enmity with God?"
These desires that we have, even the subtle ones like the
desire for ease or the desire to be entertained or the desire for fulfillment
and satisfaction, the desire for a relationship with someone else, the desire
for security or freedom – they can all become idols. You see, we were made to
worship God but ever since Adam, we have been tempted to worship the creature
and creation rather than the Creator. And we take all sorts of things as idols
– we can make little gods out of any and every desire and turn a good desire
into something that is evil because it leads to sin and worship of things and
people instead of God. This is nothing new. God said in Ezekiel 14:3, "Son of man,
these men have taken their idols into their hearts, and set the stumbling block
of their iniquity before their faces." (Ezekiel 14:3)
So how do we know when a passion is waging war against
us? How do we know when something has become idolatrous for us?
- · When we bow down to it in our hearts.
- · When we allow something to rule us to the extent that we are willing to sin when we don’t get it.
- · When we get angry when we don’t get something.
- · When we are fearful when we don’t get something.
- · When we look to anyone else or anything else for a sense of peace or satisfaction and rely on that person or thing for our happiness, it is idolatry and it is like spiritual adultery.
We cannot be friends of worldly desires and also friends
with God. The second part of verse 4 says...
“Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an
enemy of God.”
Jesus has come to reconcile us to God so that we can be
friends of God and yet when we seek after worldly desires and worship them and
let them control us, it is not neutral. Whoever wishes to be a friend of the
world, makes himself an enemy of God. Why is this the case? Because God loves
us. It would not be loving if I did not passionately seek my spouse if they
were unfaithful. If I looked at Julie and said “of all the women I love, I love
you the most”, it would be good of Julie to be upset and she would have every
right to be. But we do the same thing spiritually and we say "God, of all
the gods I have I love you the most." But this is impossible – we cannot
love the world and love God. If we wish to be a friend of the world it is
declaring ourselves an enemy of God. Look in verse 5, it says...
“Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the Scripture says, 'He yearns
jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell in us.'?”
God doesn’t want us to be satisfied in anyone or anything
else, so he yearns jealously over us and He will do whatever it takes to bring
us back to Him. And sometimes, God not giving us what we think is best is
actually God giving us more grace. And if you have been convicted today as I
have of idolatry, of spiritual adultery, there is hope. God has restoration in
store for you and me. If we have seen our anger for the evil desires that is
behind it and been convicted that we are viewing people as either the means to
get things or barriers to the things we want, there is hope. If we have been
viewing God as a divine vending machine, there is hope. If we have seen our
quarrels and fights as indications that we need a heart transplant, then there
is great hope for us. Look at verse 6, it says...
“But He gives more grace.”
God gives more grace to sinful, craving, adulterous,
undeserving people like you and me. God gives more grace than my sin. Where sin
abounds, God’s grace abounds all the more. God gives more and more and more
grace, the greater our need, the greater our sin, the greater our desperation,
God gives even more grace. God gives us His unmerited favor, because Jesus
Christ has taken all the punishment and condemnation and wrath and guilt that
we all deserve on Himself.
Jesus lovingly puts his hand under our chins, lifts up
our heads and looks into our eyes and says, peace be with you – I have taken it
all and you don’t have to be ashamed any more. For all who trust in the
sacrifice of Jesus for our heinous sins and evil desires, God now clothes us in
His righteousness, the right-standing of Jesus and makes us clean – He makes us
brand new. And God is seeking to give all those who humble themselves even more
grace. The latter part of verse 6 says...
“Therefore it says, "God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble."
He gives grace to the humble. Now, I am proud. And
sometimes I think, I am too proud to receive grace.
But there is hope to be humble. And verse 7 tells us how.
It says...
Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from
you."
Submit ourselves to God. We must say God, I submit to
your will. God, I don’t want my own way anymore. God, I don’t want my own
desires. God, I don’t want my own pleasures and passions to be what is most
important and what I demand. God, like Jesus, I want to say, “Father, nevertheless, not my will but yours
be done.” We must stop grasping for our desires and open our hands to God
and say God, I submit my desires to you – if they are your will – so be it –
but God either way, I will trust you. Then, let us all respond like verse 8
says...
“Draw near to God, and he will draw
near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you
double-minded.”
Instead of pushing God away because we don’t get what we
want, let us draw near to God and get rid of the things, the desires that have
made our hands, our actions dirty and let us get rid of the desires that have
made our hearts black. And stop being double-minded, wanting the things of the
world. And instead cry out to God for mercy and ask God to make His desires our
desires. Then, like verse 9 says, we need to respond. We need to be affected. It
says...
"Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be
turned to mourning and your joy to gloom."
There is a place for being wretched and mourning and
weeping over our sin. At times, we need to see our sin of anger and the evil
desires that motivate it and cause us to quarrel and fight and see just how
wretched we are. We need to mourn and weep over our sins and the effect of our
sins. And we need to mourn over our sins. Not to stay there but to see hope. There
is a gloominess that is appropriate for a season, so that we can experience the
grace of God – not only in the complete forgiveness or our sins as we confess
them, but so that we can experience the freedom from our sins as godly sorrow
leads to repentance.
And let me encourage you – start right away. As soon as
you can – get in a private place and confess your sins and ask God to work in
you and you will receive. Then go and ask forgiveness to your sibling, or your
friend or your child or your spouse or parent – whomever it might be that
you’ve been angry with and receive God’s grace. And as we humble ourselves, God
will give us His wonderful, freeing, liberating grace. Grace to liberate us
from enslaving desires. Grace to breath His fresh life into our souls that have
become burdened by various idols and cravings. God desires to satisfy us with
His living water. God desires to feed us with the Bread of Life. God desires to
give us joy everlasting. And he promises us in verse 10...
"Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you."
God will exalt us – He will lift us up. We can trust God
for our position. We can trust God to reward us and acknowledge us. God
promises to give us grace if we humble ourselves. Church – let us not be a
church that fights and quarrels, that is full of jealousy, envy, slander,
gossip and bitterness. But, let us be a church that is a light in a dark world.
Let us be a church, let us be a people that shines like beacons on a hill –
sticking out in a dark wasteland. For God’s glory and our good. Amen.
